Tuesday, March 29, 2011

I'm On Edge

I have an appointment with a wedding dress coming up this week, but I have no idea when it will be.  I can't help, but be scared to death of this.  Will there be others in the shop?  Regardless, the sales ladies will know that I'm a guy and it's for me.  I'm still determined not to make the same mistakes that the others make, but I am starting to hit a wall.  This has been going on for awhile and the daily routine of making sure my toes are painted, shaving, and then putting on my bra, panties, and hose is starting to wear on me.  I'm still practicing the skills that I have been told I better master, but I know those skills will open up deeper humiliations for me as I appear dressed in public and flirt with guys and possibly even get a job as a woman.

Cindy has assured me that this feeling will pass and that she hit the wall about 2 months in.  My experience is difference since they had control over me before they started feminizing me, but I am assuming that I am at a similar spot. 
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5 comments:

  1. CharmaneMarch 29, 2011 at 7:39 PM

    Practice taking deep breaths, and go with the flow!

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  2. Lesley CharlesMarch 29, 2011 at 11:31 PM

    I have a question, that you should really be asking yourself. Is this what you want to do? If yes, then go for it. If no, then find a way to be who you want to be. If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, I offer mine.

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  3. AnonymousMarch 30, 2011 at 10:40 AM

    Katie, Cindy is right, it does get easier, but I know how you feel as your masculinity is slower stripped away. I have been a sissy for almost 20 years now, beginning when I was 7. I have lived full time as a sissygurl since I was 14. My biggest mistake was challenging the authority and contol of women much smarter than me. Each time I challenged the humiliation I endured got greater and ultimately extreme. Now I have forgotten what it felt like to be a boy or have male things.
    Katie, you are very pretty and now are getting a chance to experience the fantastic joys of being feminine. I wish I understood that better way back when. Your blogs and the blogs of your sissy sisters and your Mistresses are now required reading for me. all the best to you and the gurls.
    Love and Kisses,
    Mindy (MaryJo Bailey)

    ReplyDelete
  4. tatyanareineMarch 30, 2011 at 5:30 PM

    Princess

    Relax and enjoy the experience. Regardless of where this goes, you can choose to enjoy it or fight it. Based on how nice you look, I suggest you choose enjoyment. Someday you will realize how lucky you've been and how amazing the journey has been.

    Taty

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  5. AnonymousMarch 30, 2011 at 9:33 PM

    Listen to Cindy, hon. No matter what happens, you will still be you and you'll still be a worthwhile person. I know it's not fair to say 'Don't be embarrassed'. It isn't easy to just turn off your feelings like that. It's like telling someone not to be ticklish. It's hard to do... but it is doable.
    Look around at the other girls in the shop. They aren't embarrassed. They probably aren't even giving a second thought to how they are dressed or how they're behaving. And there is no reason for you to be embarrassed either. The reason the girls have so much fun with this is that they get such a big reaction just by making you do the same simple non-embarrassing things that women do everyday.
    A big part of being embarrassed is fear or worry about what other people think of you, and that's valid, but I think you'll find that most women are more accepting of this than you think.
    If the Sales Girls thought that this was anything worse than a little harmless fun then they wouldn't have made arrangements for Colleen to bring you in.
    So just relax and be confident. And try to have fun. And if it makes you feel any better, I think very highly of you because I know how hard this must be for you, yet you keep coming back with these posts. I think that takes a lot of courage.
    That, and I think you'll look smashing in a wedding dress!

    Aloha
    Kathwyn

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